[How Behavioral Interviews Really Work: A Guide for SWEs and EMs](https://hellointerview.substack.com/p/how-behavioral-interviews-really): #### The "Table of Contents" Technique When faced with an open-ended question like "Tell me about a challenging project," don't immediately dive into one story. Instead, offer a menu of options: _"I have a few different examples I could share—a technical architecture decision where I had to balance performance and maintainability, a cross-team project where I had to align stakeholders with competing priorities, or a situation where I had to recover from a significant production incident. Which type of challenge would be most relevant for what you're evaluating?"_ This works because you demonstrate strategic thinking by categorizing your experiences, show breadth of experience across different types of challenges, and ensure you're giving them exactly the evidence they need for their assessment. It also prevents you from guessing wrong and spending five minutes on a story that doesn't address their actual question. Use this technique for places where the interviewer's intent isn't immediately clear. It can be particularly effective early in the interview when you're still calibrating to their style and priorities. #### The "Choose Your Own Adventure" Approach Once you start telling a story, you can continue to give the interviewer agency in directing the conversation: _"At this point in the project, I had to make a decision about whether to refactor the existing system or build something new. I can walk through the technical trade-offs I considered, the stakeholder alignment process, or the execution challenges we faced. What would be most helpful?"_ Doing so shows you understand that complex situations have multiple dimensions worth exploring, demonstrates your ability to think from different perspectives, and ensures the interviewer gets the specific type of evidence they're looking for rather than what you assume they want. #### The Question Flip After delivering your answer, proactively check for understanding and engagement: _"Does that give you the level of detail you were looking for, or would you like me to dive deeper into any particular aspect?"_ This is a great way to show self-awareness about communication effectiveness, demonstrates that you care about meeting their information needs, and often prompts follow-up questions that let you elaborate on your strongest points. Be warned though: only use this after substantial answers, not after every response. It's particularly valuable when you've covered a complex situation with multiple moving parts. Candidates who are constantly asking “is that good enough?” may be perceived negatively, as though they lack confidence or are trying to “target seek” to what the interviewer wants vs give an accurate reflection of who they are.